Home Improvement – Behind the Scenes

Yesterday I mentioned how I was tackling a few home improvement projects beginning with painting my kitchen walls. Well, I should have said “Today I am tackling my ONLY home improvement project ever because screw this shit I am hiring a professional next time.”

Preferably Al and Tim the Tool Man Taylor.

al; tim the tool man; home improvement

I was very optimistic about this whole painting project. Thinking “How hard is it to paint a few walls?”  The answer is hard. Very friggen hard.

I started with washing the walls first. Which was more of a obstacle than I imagined. Besides slopping soapy hot water all over the hard wood floors and myself I had a bitch of a time reaching the tops of the walls. Why? Because apparently I think my 5’4″ frame is more like that of a NBA star and I failed to realize I would need a step stool or ladder. I used a small table instead which ultimately worked but it was basically like an hour and a half Cross Fit workout.

cross fit, cross fit, jump box

And Tai, do some Jump Boxes and then your buns will feel like steel. MOVING ON.


Once the walls were washed I decided to go to our local hardware store for painting supplies and a paint roller extender because… I’m short and needed the extra height. The hardware store was open but there was not an employee in sight. I waited. And waited. And contemplated just taking my supplies and leaving an IOU but criminal theft wasn’t on the list of activities for that day so I left.

I stopped by the Dollar Store and picked up a few supplies but realized that the $1 paint brush probably wouldn’t yield the results I desired.

So a 15 minute drive to ANOTHER hardware store was ahead of me. But first, I had to run home and lock the door (since I  thought my first trip downtown would’ve lasted 2 seconds not 20 minutes) and make sure the dog wasn’t eating the paint or walls or whatever.

Hardware store trip number 2 was more successful. Thank God.

I unpacked my supplies. Put on my soapy wet clothes from before and started to tape off the walls. I would rather shut my hand in a car door than tape off trim and ceilings. What a pain in the ass. And again.. I had to use my trusty “cross fit” table again. By the time I was actually ready to paint I was so exhausted I contemplated calling someone to finish the job.

I didn’t prime the walls because I’m an asshole  the walls were already painted white and I didn’t think I needed to. Well, I did. Because the original white paint was older and drank up allllll of the paint I was slapping on the walls. I thought a gallon of paint would have been sufficient. Wrong again.

I was able to get one coat out of the gallon but I would need a second coat of paint which meant I’d need another gallon.

I bought the Benjamin Moore paint from a paint store. 30 minutes away. I had to put away the paint supplies so the dog didn’t get into them and make a mess. Change into something not soapy, wet and paint covered and get in the car to drive 30 minutes to the paint store. At 5 p.m.

I didn’t get home until after 6:30 p.m. and by that time I was in no mood to finish the job.

So guess what that means? Round 2 today. Please excuse me while I go cry.

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9 thoughts on “Home Improvement – Behind the Scenes

  1. Oh em gee. I always get this urge that I can paint anything and it won't be a pain in the ass but I'm always sorely mistaken. Hopefully round 2 goes better for you. When it comes to my home improvement project, we finally yarded our antique fireplace out last night (thanks 'yonce and papa) and now we've got a gaping hole with a lovely draft coming in… just in time for this freezing weather to hit. Our new fireplace can't come in soon enough!


  2. The best way to avoid any confusion or risk that a Buyer may not be able to qualify for the loanlearn more is to have the Buyer PRE-APPROVED for the loan from a reputable lender. This makes the Buyer almost as good as CA$H. And everybody loves CA$H!


  3. Hi, Thanks for the sharing step by step instruction about home improvement and also for the coming to me at the right time. I am going to improve my home next month. So, this one is helpful to me. Already bookmark this site for future reference. Keep up with good work.


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