Blogtober Day 1: SHOW ME THE MONEY! What I’d do if I Won the Lotto!

The Daily Tay

Okay.. so this whole Blogtober thing already seems pretty intimidating and it’s only Day 1….
But we’re just going to take it one day at a time and see how it goes. Right? Right. Fortunately for me, I have already written a post for the first prompt a month ago. I kind of feel like I’ll be a cheater if I just link the previously written post .. but whatever, I do what I want. So go read THIS ONE.

What I’d Do If I Won the Lotto – I’d Hire Men to Kidnap My Family. PART I

Comment, laugh, etc. Thanks!
I WILL add a few others to the list though for good measures.. You’re welcome.
OTHER things I’d do if I Won the Lotto.. 
1) Buy a Kardashian sister to be my BFF. Once I’m a millionaire.. I’m going to need some obnoxious friends who are also rich. I think those sisters are just the right amount of crazy. I like the drunk one the best. We will brunch and shop and drive Bentley’s and… whatever else it is they do.


2) Speaking of Kardashian’s… I’d also buy every music record label/company so Kayne can’t continue to make “albums” or whatever he calls that noise his voice makes. That’ll just be a common courtesy to mankind, right? *
3) Pink Mohawk/Tattoo sleeves. Sure, I could do that now but then I’d also probably get fired from my job. And when you’re not a millionaire.. you need a job.
4) I’d hire a group of scientists to figure out how to make coffee from Dunkin Donuts the perfect temperature and not that awful hot-as-the-sun-burn-your-throat-flesh-into-bloody-mushy-lava it is now when you purchase a cup. I know they have to brew it at a certain temperature for flavor… however, when I wake up I need my coffee in my bloodstream ASAP.


5) Actually no, I’ll just have a Dunkin built in my house and the employees can brew the coffee early enough for me so it has time to cool off.
6)  Nope. Wait. Never mind. As a millionaire, I want to spread my good fortune and have everyone enjoy perfect temperature coffee from the first sip to the last. So ignore #5.
7) I guess I should pay off my student loans? But that’s kind of lame. Ew, I hope I’m not a responsible millionaire. OHH. I’ll pay off everyone’s loans at my Alma Mater and then maybe they’ll put up a statue.. of me.. riding a unicorn and drinking champagne.
8) Low top silver metallic platform shoes from Sketchers. NEED I SAY MORE? It’s actually sad how often I’ve tried to Google these and I can’t find them. These weren’t like the Spice Girls platforms.. these were tasteful, obviously. I got them at Kids R’ Us for Christmas one year and they were my absolute favorite shoes.
9) Speaking of long lost childhood treasures.. when I win the lotto I’ll put a Slush Puppie machine on every corner. Without a syrup squirt limit. Seriously, where are these machines hiding?!


Seriously though, as fun as it is to joke about the ridiculous things I’d do with lottery winnings.. I’d obviously donate money to charity, help out my family and then invest the rest so I don’t end up like one of those idiots on that TLC show about people who waste their lotto money on boats and exotic pets.
*But I would really forbid Kayne from making anymore music.

Sincerely & Sarcastically,

Nancy

6 thoughts on “Blogtober Day 1: SHOW ME THE MONEY! What I’d do if I Won the Lotto!

  1. Obviously you should look into this statue with the unicorn and champagne sipping. It might be a good conversation piece. And Slush Puppies are literally THE drink of my childhood. So so so good.

    Like

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